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QOTD + - Mirror of Shadows
October 19th, 2009
02:19 pm
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QOTD +
Still banging head on desk repeatedly while trying to get a computer *reliably* working for consistent net access and various other projects... but for now...

On the Butch/Femme dance, but fitting other queerdoms as well:

It is quite a spectacle, really, once one sees it, these humans so devoted to dressing up and acting out... the theory that there are two sharply distinct sexes and never the twain shall overlap or be confused or conflated... marking a distinction between two sexes as though their lives depended on it. It is amazing that homosexuals and lesbians are mocked and judged for dressing in "butch-femme drag", for nobody goes about in full public view as though decked out in butch and femme drag as much as respectable heteronormatives when they are dressed up to go out in the evening, or to go to church, or to go to the office. Critics of queers' styles ought to look at themselves in the mirror on their way out for a night on the town to see who's really in drag. The answer is, everybody is. Perhaps the main difference between heteronormatives and queers is that when queers go forth, as butch, femme or anything in between, they know they are engaged in a gender theater. Heteronormatives usually are taking it all perfectly seriously, thinking they are in the real world, thinking they *are* the real world. (Marilyn Frye)

This entry was originally posted at http://sanacrow.dreamwidth.org/1453.html. There are comment count unavailable comments there.

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From:brock_tn
Date:October 20th, 2009 12:07 am (UTC)
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I just sort of got out of the habit of classifying people's clothes as "drag" or "not drag" or whatever. The more important questions are whether the clothes are becoming to the person wearing them, and how well hir wears them. Guy in a Dior cocktail dress? If he has the legs to carry it off, more power to him. Lady in a clawhammer tux? That's cool too, especially if it's been tailored to fit her properly.
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From:sanacrow
Date:October 21st, 2009 03:18 am (UTC)
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Everyone has the right to wear ugly clothes that don't become them. Even those who prefer clothes that don't socially match their presenting gender. Even those who prefer to identify as something other than a point on a gender binary.
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From:tryst_inn
Date:October 20th, 2009 03:40 am (UTC)
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Mostly I wear jeans, trail pants and combat boots yet oddly enough, I'm often described as being feminine - except by my husband. :)

I guess I'll never understand what makes someone or something feminine vs masculine.
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From:sanacrow
Date:October 21st, 2009 03:15 am (UTC)
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And I get tagged "butch" or "dyke" even when dossed out for court in 'traditional' women's wear. (I have an old-fashioned sexist boss. Professional women are not supposed to wear trousers in court. Even if both attorneys and the female judge are wearing them. (He also describes women almost solely by looks or "attitude".) Bless his pointy-headed little mind.)

I dunno. There's something that's unquantifiable that has nothing to do with any of the usual determining bits that seems to make a difference. And it's totally separate from orientation or sometimes even preferred gender identity.

It's what's going on when you have folks in the exact same clothing and can tick off "gid-male", "butch", "tomboy femme", "femme in drab" and "poser" just by the way they carry themselves and how they "feel".

I'm afraid it's a lot like art and obscenity - I don't know how to define it, but I know it when I see it and feel it.
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From:tryst_inn
Date:October 21st, 2009 03:18 am (UTC)
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Precisely. It's a Mystery. :)
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